A Story with a Moral

Once upon a time in the fair kingdom of braunmont, there lived a lowly pheasant. Then the pheasant got shot by a peasant. Then the peasant (we'll call him Ed) robbed the mighty king of all his wealth and made off into the woods were he was promptly eaten by savage mosquitoes. Proving once and for all that you shouldn't steal. You can probably tell that I have no clue what to write about, and the Sharkman story hasn't had any more inspirations so far. But keep looking, I'm bound to have some interesting story to tell someday. Ideas anyone?

I have a stupid brother his name is ben. I have to go to work now.

Sharkman Tries to Continue

From this point I am a bit confused as to where I should go next with this Sharkman thing. I guess that I'll try hard to make all you Sharkman fans happy!

Last time on Sharkman:( We learned that as Hubert was having a swim in shark infested water near a nuclear power plant he was chomped by a big shark and then he turned into a shark himself... Yeah.... Now for:) Sharkman Returns (although I didn't know that he had left)

I guess I really don't have any ideas after all. Oh, but I must discuss his superness more completely. Ok, first of all he only turned into a shark when he was in salt water (He was a shark on the beach before because his swim trunks were wet) but whenever he wanted to be a shark in freshwater he was distraught, for he could not turn into a shark then. (Boy this is a strange story!) But it was this unfortunate occurrence (or "unoccurrence") that lead to the construction of his notorious shark suit which struck sheer terror into the hearts of evildoers everywhere. Other than the unnatural ability to turn into a shark, Hubert also got a slew of other abnormal qualities about himself that I will list here.

The Superswim: This was the power to swim very vast even when he wasn't a shark.

The Superchomp: This power came in real good handy when he went out to fancy restaurants like Applebee's and ordered a piece of steak.

The Watersniff: The ability to smell trouble in the water from two miles away.

The Iron torso: A very strong torso (which, by the way, no good superhero can go without).

And Finally, The Sharktongue: This allowed him to converse with any shark he pleased (which came in handy dandy later on).

Sharkman Begins

No, it is not haddock day anymore. But it is the first time in quite awhile that I have had a chance to get on the blogger. But, it seems that I have all kinds of fantastic ideas of things to blog about but I always forget them when I get on the computer. Perhaps I shall tell you a story about the menny avencherz uv... SHARKMANN!! Dananananananananananananananana SHARKMANN!!!! Oh deere, I'm drawing a blank.
Once upon a time there lived a man who loved to swim. One day... Hubert (that was his name I guess) decided to go for a swim near a nuclear power plant. Don't ask me why he decided to do that because I really have no clue. But it just so happened that there was a rather large and sinister looking shark swimming near the same power plant on that very same day who promptly bit Huey's pinkey fingers off and swam away laughing. Now Huey was not the excitable sort and, examining the situation carefully, decided that the best thing to do was to get out of the water (a logical idea in my opinion). So Hubert swim for shore and save himself and, feeling a bit drowsy, decided to drive home and take a nap. unfortunately for him his car had mystyriously fallen off a large cliff and exploded. Deciding at last that there was nothing better to do he lew himself down and dozed off right on the beach. when he awoke, he had a strange inclination to go for another swim and, feeling nothing better to do (which, quite often in Hueys life there was nothing better to do) began to try and get up. But for some reason beyond his guessing, try as he might he could not manage to get himself up. But he soon discovered that rolling himself over and over was not only for children but for him too (at least it was at this point in time). The water was looking ever so good to him at the moment and for the life of him he couldn't figure out why (He also greatly desired a tuna fish sandwich). He was much relieved when, at last he splished into the water. He somehow found the water unusually comfortable and began swimming around. And in this way, Hubert learned that, over the period in which he was peacefully sleeping, he was also peacefully turning into a shark.

Haddock day

Howdy howdy howdy! I cant think of anything groovy to write about today. Oh yeah, today is haddock cleaning day at work so I must be very prepared to clean 65 libras of foosh, or feesh, or fash, or is it foshes. It is usually a lot of fun because me and Joel whisper and laugh at random foolishness and then danielle gets very cranky because she always thinks that we are laughing at her. We really only very rarely ever laughed at her and I don't think that we actually have in quite some time now so she really has no need to get so distraught over the whole thing. Although one time I did march up to her one time with a wet, cold, slimy fish in my hand and slapped her in the face with it, which of course made everybody laugh uproariously except for Danielle. Her face has dripping and had pieces of raw haddock all over it. Okay, so that part dinnit really happen.

Jumbled thoughts on my trip to Mississippi.

Todasy iejnhvklshoifvkjblnsedy... Today is my first full day back at home. As you may have seen I spent the last nine days out of town. I went with a group of guys from CCW, CCFL, and CCN (Calvary Chapel Webster, Finger Lakes, and Newark) to Mississippi to help people fix their houses. Can you understand what I just wrote?? Oh well. Anyhow, we all had a blessid time and I cant write good today and I don't know why. ahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! But I did make some groovy new friends like Joseph Frascatore, and his daddy Tom, And George "Humble" Humby, and... oh it would take a while to go through all of the groovy dudes that went. But it was a fun time.

The Imposter

Joe can't be here today. He is not home. He went on a long trip. He is in Biloxi, Mississippi. That is all for today.

Tuesdays

"Porridge today Gromit, Tuesday." Nate just made himself some oatmeal for breakfast but he dinnit make any for anyone else! "I think I'll get my own porridge." Maybe I should just make some yummy eggses! Or some crunchable birdses! Mmmm, juicy sweet. Haha, I am such a doofas.
Today is, as I said, Tuesday, and I very strongly dislike working on Tuesdays because I work with a bunch of girls that like to tell me how everything is done and how I always burn stuff which is not true (not that I can remember anyway). They always seem very ready to boss me around all day while they stand around and chit-chat like women do. "Joe, I dont want to do that job so you can do it, and when your done you can do all those other jobs that I hate. I'll just stand here and talk about all the troubles in my life." Then I have to train Nancy on the fryer which is really quite hopeless because she never listens to anything I tell her. She's always giving the customer vegetable oil sandwiches and stuff like that. Yes, Working at Orbakers on a Tuesday when I am the only Guy there during the day is quite an endeavor.

Killer Looks

Here is a self portrait of myself. As you can see I am quite a handsome fellow. Maybe I should go into the acting business. I am sure that they would give me the main role in any film I wished to star in, from "Indiana Smith" to "the Life and Trials of a Marine Biologist". Don't you Agree?

Sorry Brian

Today is tuesday, March... 7th? Any way, on saturday me and my friend Brian went to Brantling hill in Sodus to go snowboarding ( oh yeah, his sister Heather went too, LOL). It was quite frusterating for me at first becuase every time I tried to turn I fell on my bum. Brian tried to encourage me by saying that that stuff always happens and to just stick with it. And me, being all flummoxed, would always respond to him kind of sharply (not to be rude but just cause I was irratated and embarrassed at falling down on the bunny hill. So I think I made Brian mad at me for that but I really didn't mean to.
And then at about 3:30 PM I fell backwards after hitting a little bump and hit my head and got a head-ache and then I dinnit feel like snowboarding any more but Brian did and he got all dissappointed... Grrr. Maybe I'll go agian sometime and do better and not get so irratated and hurt my good friends feelings. Sorry Brian.

my life story

I am getting tired of cooking french fries for six hours a day. I want to do something else with my life now. I'm sure that there are millions of kids who feel the same way. If I was making $8 an hour like all the other cooks there I wouldnt mind so much but I make miminum wage, wich I guess is better than nothing.

Of the US Military

Today I would Like to let everyone be aware that I am considering joining either the Army or the Army National guard. Yes weep for me, lift up your voice and lament for my time has come to leave this wretched place and become who I was born to be!

But really, why is it that whenever I mention to somebody that I may join the U.S. military, they try to convince me not to? They say stuff like, "No I don't want you to get shot", and "You're too smart for the military". I may be too smart for the military I guess (haha) but... then again, maybe they need some edumicated... WAIT A MINUTE!! To everyone who thinks that the military is made up of stupid kids who couldn't get any other job I advise you to think again. The U.S. military is chok full of highly intelligent kids from all over the country.

I have to go to work now. Bye bye

I Dont Know What to Write

For the first time in... awhile I get to post something! Now, what should I post?
How about I post an essay that I have written. Tell me what you think.


Dear Editor,


I am absolutely disgusted at the December 5 editorial which stated that there are no military heroes. What an unpatriotic thing to say! U.S. Soldiers are daily putting their lives on the line to defend our country and we thank them by saying “there are no military heroes”?? That sickens me!
And saying that our military personnel are trained “shoddily” is a direct insult to all of our armed forces. I personally know three marines and I can assure you, they are not trained “shoddily.”
Also, before being too quick in saying that we are the aggressor in this war, remember September 11 (an event to which we all said “we will never forget”), and remember also, the U.S.S. Cole. We are not the aggressor.
One more thing, liberating millions of people from the grasp of a ruthless mass murderer is not what I call “morally wrong.” I honestly can’t understand why some people insist on lowering our troop’s morale.
Remember, greater love has no man than he who lays down his life for his friend.



Sincerely,



Josiah Teal


That one actually got published in the Rochester Democrat & Chronicle on Dec. 18, 2005. I was so pleased (although it did get edited by the editor).

Hooray hooray!

Finally, a blog of my very own! This is something I have desired to do before I knew that blogs even existed. I was doing them on my word processor before. to bad nobody will ever be able to read all that good stuff, I always laugh hysterically whenever I read those. Now every one will be able to laugh hysterically!!!


actually that right there wasn't very funny at all.